Why Time Sucks

I'd liked to have written this blog yesterday, but I didn't have time. In fact, I don't really have time to write this right now. They say that everyone has the same amount of time, but I don't beleive them. I think that some of us have a unique ability to speed through time unabated, completely helpless to get a grip on the fourth dimension long enough to actually accomplish anything, or even feel like we've lived a full day.

You heard me right - they call time the fourth dimension. What the heck is with that? How is time a dimension? I can't write time on a ruler, or picture it in my head. That's a pretty lame dimension if you ask me. Even if it is a dimension, vandalize the thought, I bet it's a lot higher than number four. Number six perhaps...

Unconvinced that time sucks? How about this: I spent the first 18 years of my life trying to be an adult. I spent the next year trying to get bar-legal (not that i wanted to drink, but who likes being told what they can't do?), and then the next two years after that getting bar-legal for Virginia. (Not that I'm actually allowed to drink then either - as per University rules). I'll be spending the next four years trying to get out of university, and then the next two trying to enjoy myself and get financially grounded before Michael Jr. comes into the world and eats all my mushy-food. (Not that I prefer my food mushy...)

'Time' takes very little time to say, but more time to spell. It has only four letters, but uses twenty-four numbers (unless of course you'd prefer to argue that seconds put that number higher). Did that last comment confuse you? Well, I don't have time to explain myself further.

In fact, time is so inconvenient that it's making my Cyst List!

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In case you're keeping track, the list is now: Osama Bin Laden (spit), Hamas (spit again, and then remove all foreign aid), Wal-Mart (spit and then try not to spend too much $), The Modern Media (just keep spitting... get a glass of water if you have to), McDonald's (tasy, yet some saliva neccisary to ingest anyway), the Six O' Clock news (watch out Eleven O' Clock news - you're next!), time (i'll explain later), asymmetry without complete chaos (because that's just sadistic to do that to an anal retentive person such as myself), and the non-word phat, because it's sick. No, I mean 'sick' as in 'stupid'.